November 25, 2011 | By:

Black Friday

What I Need to Know About Black Friday, I Learned From Watching Zombieland by Emily Siden

For those of you have not seen Zombieland, I will give you a brief synopsis or you can read about it to your hearts content here ( It’s a comedy film in which basically, the world is being infected with cannibal zombies and a small group of survivors fight a daily battle to stay alive on their journey by following a set of rules they make up.

With Black Friday here and so many “survival” guides and tips being advertised, I couldn’t help but think of “The Rules” from this movie. So I’ve decided to take a few of them and draw a parallel to compose yet another “Black Friday Guide.” Enjoy.

The Rules:

1. Cardio – Obviously, it’s important to be in shape to get the upper hand on all the other shoppers. If you’re fast, you’re first.

2. Double Tap – Or basically double-check your list. Like Santa checks his list twice…learn from the best.

3. Beware of Bathrooms – Plain and simple…there are no sales here and you can’t buy anything in them.

4. Travel Light – Make frequent runs to your vehicle to drop off a load of merchandise. That way you can still be fast (again, this is why Rule #1 is important).

5. Don’t Be a Hero – Don’t sacrifice yourself trying to get the last popular video game in stock. If you can’t get it, just blame it on Santa and BAM – you’re still a hero, at least in your kid’s eyes.

6. Limber Up – Agility is just as important as cardio. Pulling a muscle or spraining something could put an end to your Black Friday marathon.

7. The Buddy System – Utilize friends and family members- better yet, bring the pet pack mule along- oh the possibilities!

8. Check the Backseat – For more room to cram things of course, what else?!

9. When in Doubt, Know Your Way Out – Pretty self-explanatory. Having a smartphone and GPS helps…not to mention a compass…or following an exit sign (yes they’re red and shiny, no you cannot take them to add to your Christmas light display).

10. Clean Socks – When the ordeal is over, after all the blood, sweat and tears you’ve secreted and/or been drenched with, you’re going to want to change your socks…duh.

P.S. Support the second annual Small Business Saturday on the 26th!

Tags: ,

Categorized in:

Featured Articles

February 1, 2018 | By: Ilfusion Team

How To Start an SEO Campaign in 6 Steps

Starting a Search Engine Optimization (SEO) campaign can be tricky for any digital marketer. How do you begin? What is the most important element to implement? How do you know if it’s working? Don’t be overwhelmed, though. Starting an SEO... view more

September 26, 2017 | By: Tinny

5 Signs You Need to Hire a Marketing Agency

Marketing is a crucial part of your business strategy. It’s what keeps the gears turning and the driving force of your company’s sales. For small businesses, marketing is important in getting the word out there that your company exists and... view more

September 21, 2017 | By: Tinny

Key Advantages of Video Marketing for Your Growing Business

There has been a rise in the use of mobile devices to access the internet, and there are no signs of it slowing down anytime soon. In this era where most people thrive on living on the go, video marketing... view more

September 13, 2017 | By: Tinny

5 Things You Need to Know: Image Optimization for SEO

If you’re a company whose content strategy relies on images, or if your business blog is image-heavy, it’s high time for you to think about optimizing your images for SEO — if you haven’t done so already. While there isn’t... view more

August 2, 2017 | By: Tinny

Tips on How to Choose the Best Keywords for Your Website

When you have an SEO or PPC campaign, it all starts with one basic element: keyword research. Keywords are the driving force that enable web crawlers and indexers to find your page through the throngs of websites in the world-wide... view more

July 26, 2017 | By: Tinny

Top 3 Search Ranking Factors You Should Know About

Landing on the first page of Google’s search engine results is one of the ultimate marketing goals of many website owners. While Google is keeping mum on what exactly gets you to the top of their SERPs, there are factors... view more

June 28, 2017 | By: Tinny

The Importance of Social Media in SEO

Nowadays, social media has inarguably become an indispensable tool in any marketing strategy. SEO, of course, is also one of those tools that have evolved with the many trends and changes that has occurred through time. This leads marketers to... view more

April 27, 2017 | By: Tinny

5 Ways to Dominate Google’s Search Results in 2017

Here’s how to place your website at the top of search engine results. Creating a website that doesn’t rank well in Google’s search engine results page (SERP) doesn’t translate well to your overall business effort. In recent years, Google has... view more

July 2, 2015 | By: The Conductor

Let’s talk about “The Fold”

We hear it a lot; client feedback that is focused on what content is and is not “above the fold”. To be perfectly honest, this old newspaper term can be a cause of frustration when it comes to good user... view more

June 3, 2015 | By: The Doctor

The Turbit

This crazy ol’ world of ours is spinning faster and faster everyday. Not literally, as we would all be slung to our spacey-doom. I mean figuratively we are all moving more quickly and filling every moment with some bit of... view more

May 6, 2015 | By: Ilfusion Team

How Your Website Can Survive Mobilegeddon

Think your website is mobile friendly? Think again. Google’s new functionality changes have created a frantic need for websites to be optimized for mobile. Mobilegeddon is upon us, and your website could be at risk. See infographic below.

April 23, 2015 | By: El Jefe

Website Cost: A Day at the Ballpark

A question that I get on a regular basis (read: every day) is, “How much will my new website cost?”. To which I typically say something like, “Well, that varies based on the amount of work that’s required to complete... view more

April 7, 2015 | By: The Inventor

Are you a Webspammer?

SEO practices are very different today than how they were even just a few years ago. The number one key to ranking well in search engines today is to create unique quality content. First post it on your website or... view more

March 25, 2015 | By: Ilfusion Team

Social Media Happenings

Ilfusion loves to bring you news on the newest social media functions and trends. Recently, there have been three major happenings in the social media world. Meerkat, a new app that has risen to fame due to the 2015 music... view more

March 12, 2015 | By: The Conductor

The Big Picture

Whether you’re laser-focused on a specific project, or taking a comprehensive approach to your marketing efforts, one aspect doesn’t change: always look at the big picture. Companies often shop at least a few agencies when they’re considering engagement with an... view more